Sacrifice
by Whisp
Summary: AU set before BDM. Simon doesn't know any safewords.


**Summary:** An AU set before BDM. Simon doesn't know any safewords.  
**Rating:** R  
**Characters:** Simon and River  
**Warning:** character death  
**Spoilers/Timeline:** Pre-movie  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine. Please don't sue.

**Authors Notes:** Also posted in my livejournal. Please comment, I'd love to hear what you thought of it.

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The dying rays of the sun burn into his eyes. Simon wants to look away, but doesn't dare take his eyes off the figure in front of him.

He follows her across the dry cracked land. They've been walking for hours on some backwater moon where the Alliance screwed up terraforming, shrugged, shoved some settlers on it, and walked away. They're about half a mile out of the closest town.

Simon silently thanks whatever bastard had given the crew of Serenity this job, the one that landed them on this moon. It's relatively unpopulated, so the body count is low. He shudders and tries not imagine what could have happened if the trigger had occurred in some crowded city bar.

"River?" Simon calls out softly. She doesn't stop.

They're at the edge of the town now, close enough that Simon can see in through the windows of the dimly lit houses. There's a pair of children playing in one, trying to coax out a few more minutes of fun before bedtime. River tilts her head as their shrieks of laughter reach her ears. Simon breath catches in fear.

He calls out louder. "River. Stop."

This time she turns around to face him, and the crimson fabric of her dress flutters and catches around her legs. With the setting sun behind, her face is cast in shadows. There's a barely controlled wildness in her eyes and Simon almost flinches away.

In spite of that, he takes a hesitant step closer. "Mei mei, it's me. It's your brother." River tenses as he approaches but doesn't move. There's coiled strength hidden in the soft lines of her body. Her fingers tighten convulsively around the gun at her side, but she makes no move to raise it. Simon's hand reaches up slowly to touch her cheek.

"Simon?" She asks. Something shifts in her, a small hint of confusion and then clarity appearing on her face. "Everyone left. It's so quiet now."

Despite the heat, Simon feels a chill. "Yes." he says softly.

"Where did they go?" She looks down at the gun in her hand and frowns. "No touching guns." She whispers and drops it in the dirt.

Simon breaths a quiet sigh of relief. He grabs Mal's gun off the ground. The metal's warm in his hand, the blood half-dried and tacky around the handle. He empties out the bullets - there's only one left - and releases the gun. Futilely tries to wipe the blood off his hand.

Looks back up in time to see River fall to her hands and knees, retching in the dirt. The lines of her body are broken as she hunches over. Her fists curl up handfuls of dry earth. "Oh god..." She gasps and shakes, "Oh god... Floated away and can't come back."

Simon abandons his fear. He only sees his little sister in front of him as he gathers up her trembling body in his arms. Simon can't do anything but hold her close. He rocks her back and forth as she cries. Thinks about the innocent little girl he used to hold after nightmares, so many years ago. She'd been only a slip of a girl then.

River lets out a breathy laugh and clutches at him, fingers leaving red trails down the skin of his arms as she whispers against his chest. "Sent away whole and got back a shell. Pieces hurt when you touch them."

He tangles a hand in her hair as he hugs her close. "No." He says fiercely. "We'll find a way through this, River. You'll get better. We just can't give up hope."

"No more Christmases left. It's so dark now." Abruptly seized with emotion, River shoves Simon away. "They're just shells." She screams like she's being skinned alive and presses her hands to her ears. "Break away and can't come back. I have to help them go."

She scrambles away and grabs Mal's gun, then starts stalking towards the town. Whips it up when Simon leaps in between her and the houses. Simon stands point blank and frozen. There's a stalemate for a second.

Then the gun clicks once, and then again and again as River's red-stained hands convulse around the trigger. "No power in the verse..." She breathes. "Oh god... Help me Simon."

The gun drops from numb fingers. Her face crumples as she sobs. Falling to the ground, River buries her head in her knees.

Simon drops to the ground next to her. He's not sure his legs would have held him up for longer anyways. The shock has stolen the words from his lips.

It's quiet for a long time. The sun slips under the horizon, leaving red streaks momentarily before it gets dark. The town behind them has grown quieter. It's become cold quickly in the desert air.

Sitting quietly next to River, Simon is lost in thought. His troubled eyes never wander from where his sister lay curled up under his jacket. He's shivering, but he's not sure it's from the cold. He starts a little when River stirs and prepares himself for the worst.

River pulls his jacket tighter around her shoulders. There's confusion in her eyes as she looks around before settling her gaze on Simon. "Where did everyone go?"

"Away." He answers. He's too weary to say any more.

River gazes at Simon for a long minute.

Sliding closer to him, she wraps her thin arms around his body and shuts her eyes. Breathes in the warmth of his body for comfort. "It's just a shell."

With one hand, Simon turns her frail body so she rests in the crook of his arm and cradles her head against his chest. The other takes out the knife he had liberated from Jayne's cooling body.

Not many people know that the heart shifts when you're born. Tilts its axis so it sits off center. Closing his eyes, he slides the knife quietly between her ribs. Right atrium, right ventricle, left ventricle, left atrium, he recites in his head. Her body spasms once and is still. There isn't much blood.

He lays her body gently across the scarred terrain. The fingers of his hand smooth back her hair from her face, leaving a drying streak of warm blood and tears in their wake.


End file.
